My Inner Critic Is Miranda Priestly

Let’s talk about our inner critics…

We all have one: that little voice that tells us we’re not enough. Sometimes it tells us we can’t do it, that we’re not lovable, or that we should put more effort in. There is too much negative shit we tell ourselves. 

It’s funny when I sit down and try to trace those thoughts, understand them, and do some thinking, I end up getting overwhelmed. Because I eventually realized that I was walking in a dark tunnel for hours, with aggressive thoughts directed at me, by me. Always with the same conclusion: “Why am I talking to myself like that?”

The only person that I have is myself. Everyone in the world can tell me I’m not gonna make it, but if I say that to myself, then who’s gonna have my back? 

And the opposite is even worse. People around me can cheer me on, tell me I’m doing incredible things, but I go and talk to myself in such a way that breaks me little by little. And then the spiral starts, constantly doubting and criticizing myself. 

So I end up with the same problem: a little voice nagging at me, criticizing. 

Everyone has one, and to a certain extent, it’s healthy to question yourself. But where do we draw the line? Why do we criticize ourselves? 

And who said we can’t nudge that inner voice in a more positive direction? 

For me, this little inner critic is a bully with low energy and, at times, very foreign to my truest bubbly self. Still, I let it convince me of the worst things. 

So, as a true overthinker, I did this exercise of consciously listening to it for a few minutes and writing down everything it said to me. 

When I reread those words, I was so shocked that I had to write about it. 

Because no one shares what their inner critics say to them. But hey, that’s why I’m here.

I decided to go deeper into the exercise and wrote down the characteristics of this voice. The one that struck me the most: bully. 

I was surprised because I was bullied as a kid, so I wanted to dive deeper, so I tried to give it a name, a persona. I came up with Miranda Priestly, who is more of a bully than her am I right? 

Once I did this, it became a bit easier to understand that voice, recognize when it was Miranda, and when it was me.

So when do I know it’s Miranda talking to me? 

It’s an authoritative voice, it pretends to be savvy, knowing “what’s best for you”, she’s an editor, a critic who finds errors in everything. It’s a voice that is persistent, irrational, and creeps up on you when you least expect it. 

But how do you stop this auto-bullying? Good news, everything in this life needs balance. So if you have an inner critic, you also have an inner mentor. 

And that’s the key. 

So to find that inner mentor, I did the same exercise: I sat down, listened to the praise, described its characteristics, and named him. 

I came up with things like “I’m proud of how far I’ve come”, “I feel sure of myself," “I value my effort,” and it eventually came down to “I’m beautiful, I’m doing amazing, keep going”.

I realized that this voice was the complete opposite of Miranda Priestly. It’s comforting, funny, cheeky, and of course, a bit sexy. 

So of course, I named it Michael Scott, always the optimistic and ultra sure of himself (almost to a delusional point). But why is this contrast important?

Because my inner critic will always exist and be a part of me, sometimes it can keep me safe and aware. The goal is not to get rid of it, but to know how to pull yourself out of that constant loop of self-criticism. 

So you can listen to your Miranda Priestly for 1 or 2 minutes and then bring your Michael Scott into the conversation. 

Find that balance by naming them and understanding what they are trying to tell you. It’s important not to surrender to them and just believe blindly what they’re saying. Because guess what? At the end of the day, those voices are inside of you; they’re you. You need to take your position as team leader, guide them to what is best for you as a whole. You can never forget that.  

This takes time. Sitting with yourself, really listening to those voices, it’s not always comfortable. But it’s worth it. At first, it might feel strange. Even a bit confronting. But the more you do it, the more your inner dialogue softens. It becomes calmer, clearer, and kinder.

You start to understand yourself better. Not the version shaped by doubt, but the one that’s actually yours.

So try it.

Find your Miranda Priestly. Find your Michael Scott.

Name them, listen to them, learn how to separate them.

And most importantly, don’t just believe everything they say.

Because at the end of the day, they’re both you. And you get to decide who leads the conversation.

So hold yourself dear, and don’t let go. 

Love 

L